Saturday, December 22, 2007

lack of content

i just realized it's been a whole month since i posted anything on this blog. allow me to shamelessly plug my other blog, the one with pictures. i've updated that more frequently while neglecting this one. my head does not hang in shame, however: i Have Been Busy.

so as you probably know, Christmas is two and/or three days away. this is what i would like to talk about today: when you say "Christmas" do you mean Christmas Eve or Christmas Day? (i'm ignoring you people who believe it is an entire season.) are you saying one of them is Christmas and one of them is not Christmas? are they both called Christmas on your calendar? oh...yes. they are.

i am here to suggest that Christmas is TWO days, and not just one.

now, please be open-minded.

some people might hold the idea that Christmas Eve is not actually Christmas, even though Christmas is in the title. and, if it is not Christmas, why does Santa come that night?

you see, if Christmas is actually two days, then we must endure the silliness of referring to Christmas Eve Day, Christmas Day Afternoon, Christmas Day Night, and Christmas Eve Morning. this hooliganism is what has led me to my theory that it is actually not two days, but one 48-hour day. the astronomical inconsistencies in my proposal are negligible, and even president bush, for all his shortcomings, has noticed this and given the government ALL of christmas off of work.

thus, please re-form your vocabularies and concepts of truth to reflect this important holiday reality. thanks, and have a merry christmas!

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